Salad Smurfs: The Movie (story)/Part 1

Empath's personal journal.

''After the success of his first movie, Smurf Wars: A New Hope, Actor decided to go behind the camera once again to produce another movie, this time on an entirely different subject matter and with a bit of humor. He decided to create a horror film that would have the Smurfs star as themselves, though none of the Smurfs in the village actually play themselves because these are all Imaginarium-created versions of every Smurf in the village with this smurf, Baby Smurf, and the Smurflings somehow left out of it. Tonight is the night that the movie will be playing at the Smurf Theater for everybody to watch. This smurf hopes that everyone will be entertained by it just as they were entertained by the outer space fantasy film.'' - The village was in quite a stir as all the Smurfs had gathered at the Smurf Theater, all eager to see the result of Actor's latest film effort. All the Smurfs were given tickets by Brainy Smurf as they entered one at a time and went to the refreshment stands being operated by Greedy and his kitchen crew to get something to eat before the show started.

"I can't imagine what kind of horror story this is going to be, Empath," Smurfette said as she sat by him in one of the seats with her box of popcorn in hand.

"Actor has been very secretive about the details, Smurfette, which makes this smurf even more curious to find out for myself," Empath said.

"You are going to smurf beside me through the whole thing?" Smurfette asked.

"Don't worry, Smurfette...whatever frightens us on the screen, we'll be frightened together," Empath said.

"You are aware that this is just what you call a 'motion picture' being projected on a screen, which cannot in any shape or form cause physical harm to any Smurf, Empath," Polaris Psyche said as he was sitting next to Empath.

"Just because something doesn't cause physical harm doesn't mean that it can't be scary to watch, Polaris," Empath said. "We have both endured terrible forms of punishment and agony during our years of training in Psychelia together, and we have both survived it."

"Indeed we have, Empath, and it's not necessarily something that this one would wish to undergo again in the foreseeable future," Polaris said. "Still, this one would surmise that this form of entertainment would be less torturous for us to watch than anything the Psyche Master has subjected us to."

"Who knows, Polaris, if you might find something in this horror film that would be disturbing in any way, besides us Smurfs acting like savages like we normally do," Empath said.

"You do not need to be insulting about my views of the Smurfs, Empath," Polaris said.

"This smurf was only kidding with you, Polaris," Empath said. "Just sit back and enjoy the show."

"Oh, come on, Empath, you didn't need to smurf your friend Polaris like that," Smurfette said.

"Polaris knows that this smurf never means to offend him, Smurfette," Empath said. "It just wouldn't be his nature to be that sensitive to that kind of joke."

"About us being savages?" Smurfette asked. "Really, I thought you outsmurfed that kind of thinking."

"This smurf has outgrown it for the most part," Empath said.

"Well, why don't you prove it by not wearing that shirt you always smurf?" Smurfette said.

Before Empath could say anything more, he was interrupted by Actor Smurf calling everybody's attention toward the stage when he appeared on it.

"Thank you all for smurfing to the debut of my latest film tonight," he said. "I know I'm still smurfing on the sequel to Smurf Wars, and I promise you that it will be smurfing out sometime soon. But in the meantime, I'm going to be smurfing you a horror film that makes us smurf at ourselves as Smurfs and see what kind of world we smurf in when we're not careful of what we're smurfing when it comes to the food that we smurf every day. And so tonight, I bring you...SALAD SMURFS!"

"Salad Smurfs?" every Smurf in the audience said together.

"I hate Salad Smurfs," Grouchy said.

"So don't be frightened, because it's only a movie," Actor said. "And so without any further ado, let's roll the camera and get the movie smurfed."

Every Smurf in the audience cheered as Spinner started up the movie projector and saw the spinning 5, 4, 3, 2 on the screen before the theme music played a haunting tune and everybody saw

SMURF CINEMAS PRESENT

AN ACTOR SMURF PRODUCTION

And following in styled letters... SALAD SMURFS