The Many Loves Of Smurfette/Part 4

"So you picked Uncle Hefty and Uncle Handy as your choices and you just let them smurf it out with each other over who's the best Smurf?" Psycheliana said. "That smurfs rather cruel of you, Mama."

"I still find myself attracted to them even to this day, Liana," Smurfette said. "Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I married either of them instead of your Papa, but then I would smurf things that would end up not being right when it came to marrying Hefty or Handy."

"Sometimes I feel like Uncle Hefty should have been my Papa," Psycheliana said.

"I know how you feel, Liana, but then you wouldn't have existed as the special Smurfette that you are if that was the case," Smurfette said. "That doesn't mean that Uncle Hefty doesn't love you or me, remember that."

"So you chose Uncle Hefty and Uncle Handy because you were under Gargamel's spell, and now the whole village is fighting over which of the two would be the best for you," Psycheliana said, as she wanted to hear more of the story. "What happens next?"

"Well, that night the two Smurfs decided that they were going to smurf me a serenade to prove that they would be the right ones for me, Liana, and I just simply smurfed from the balcony of my house and watched them and their fellow Smurfs play their music," Smurfette said.

And as Smurfette continued her story, Psycheliana saw that she was at the balcony of her house that evening, just quietly watching the stillness of the village under the pale moonlight, when Handy arrived with his musical band to start his serenade. Handy, who was playing a mandolin, tested his voice to make sure that it sounded right for singing before he started.

"Smurfette, the choice is clear, the Smurf of your dreams is here,..." he began to sing, until he was interrupted by a blaring trumpet sound. It was Harmony trying to make himself known with his own "serenade". He snickered as he saw Handy was reeling from having his eardrums assaulted by Harmony's music playing.

After Harmony disappeared, Handy restarted his serenade. "Smurfette, the choice is clear, the Smurf of your dreams is here; forget about Hefty and all the rest,..." Handy sang.

Then suddenly Handy was interrupted again by Harmony playing his own "serenade" with his trumpet. Handy's band waited until Harmony was finished playing, and then started their serenade over from the top.

"Smurfette, the choice is clear, the Smurf of your dreams is here,..." Handy began to sang, until he was interrupted for a third time by Harmony trying to play his "serenade". Handy got so upset with Harmony that he hurled him to the outskirts of the village along with his trumpet.

Without any further interruptions, Handy and his band simply began the serenade again. "Smurfette, the choice is clear, the Smurf of your dreams is here; forget about Hefty and all the rest, for yours truly, Handy, is still the best," Handy sang.

Soon another Smurf musical band appeared outside Smurfette's house, this time led by Hefty. They played a different sounding serenade to Smurfette, with Hefty also playing the mandolin while he sang. "The only Smurf for you..." Hefty started to sing until Harmony showed up yet again to interrupt the serenade with his own trumpet playing.

After Harmony had passed by, Hefty's band resumed playing. "The only Smurf for you is the one who is true blue...that Smurf is me...my name is Hefty," Hefty sang as he played.

Then the two bands alternated between their serenades, with Handy playing his and Hefty playing his, until they both ended up playing them at the same time to drown out the other. Smurfette simply watched and listened as the musical duel ended up turning into a fight between Hefty and Handy and the two musical bands that supported either.

The noise of the scuffle became loud enough to get Papa Smurf out of his house to deal with the situation. "Stop this at once!" he commanded. As soon as the two groups of Smurfs stopped fighting, he said, "What's the matter with you Smurfs? Now go home and smurf some sleep!"

"Yes, Papa Smurf," the Smurfs in both groups said before they departed to their houses.

Papa Smurf saw Smurfette now standing at the door of her house. "Smurfette, this fighting between the Smurfs has got to stop," Papa Smurf advised. "If you can't decide which of the two Smurfs is going to be the one you'll marry, the whole village could tear itself apart."

"Oh, but isn't it romantic, Papa Smurf?" Smurfette said with a snicker as she took a few more whiffs of her flower. "Besides, you know that Smurfs will be Smurfs." She then tossed the flower outside as she went back inside her house.

Papa Smurf picked up the fallen flower and examined it closely. "Hmmm, I sense that there is great evil smurfing from this flower," he said, before he noticed that it suddenly disappeared without a trace, and then he realized for himself who gave Smurfette the flower. "Gargamel!"

Just then, Tapper in his nightgown joined Papa Smurf outside Smurfette's house. "Great Smurfiny Crickets, Papa Smurf, what was all that racket smurfing on out here while the other Smurfs are trying to sleep?" he said after he yawned.

"I have a feeling Gargamel may be behind influencing Smurfette to make the other Smurfs fight each other over whether she will choose Handy or Hefty, Tapper," Papa Smurf said.

"Gargamel?" Tapper said, sounding a bit surprised. "Ah, so that explains what was smurfing on just a few minutes ago. I had a feeling in m spirit that something about this wasn't quite right. What are you going to smurf about it?"

"I'm going to have to work on an antidote that will hopefully bring Smurfette to her senses, Tapper," Papa Smurf said. "In the meantime, I will also have to separate the two Smurfs, not to mention the whole village, so that it doesn't smurf into a civil war over something like who Smurfette will marry."

"I don't like the idea that the village needs to be separated at all, Papa Smurf, but I trust that I know what you're smurfing is for the best," Tapper said. -- "So Grandpa Smurf had the whole village separated in the hopes that they wouldn't be fighting over Hefty and Handy," Psycheliana realized. "Great Ancestors, this whole thing sounded really serious."

"That wasn't the only time that the village was divided, Liana," Smurfette said. "About three years before your Papa smurfed home for good, we were smurfing the Smurfic Games Tournament, not only to smurf ourselves in shape in case Gargamel or Azrael would smurf after us, but also because our whole village was fighting over the correct use of the word 'smurf', like 'corksmurf' and 'smurfscrew'. But when the village was divided into two teams, the division line was smurfed right over Clumsy's house, so I decided that he and I were going to be our own team."

"You and Clumsy as a Smurfic Games Tournament team," Psycheliana laughed. "I only wish that I was there to smurf it in person, Mama, because Uncle Clumsy smurfing anything always makes me laugh."

"I was still under the influence of Gargamel's evil flower by morning, Liana, so things weren't going to smurf any better with the other Smurfs by the time the line was smurfed through the village," Smurfette said. "And your Uncle Brainy was the one who was smurfing the line."

"Uncle Brainy was smurfing the line?" Psycheliana said. "Oh, please, Mama Smurf, tell me more about it."

And as Smurfette continued her story, Psycheliana saw that early in the morning, Brainy was outside with a can of paint and a paintbrush, humming the Smurf song while he has painting a line on the ground. Smurfette stepped outside her house to see Brainy doing this. "Oh, Brainy, what is it that you're doing?" she sweetly asked.

"It's something that smurfed straight from Papa Smurf, Smurfette," Brainy said. "You see, in order to keep Hefty and Handy from fighting over you, he has ordered me to smurf a line straight through the center of the village so that Hefty will stay on his side of the village and Handy will stay on his side."

Smurfette looked a bit upset that such a thing should be put in place, but she soon disguised her feelings about it. "Why, Brainy, I just love the way that you paint," Smurfette said. "It's just so...so smurfy."

"Really, Smurfette?" Brainy said, caught by surprise. "I didn't think there was anything about me that you would find so appealing. Of course, if Papa Smurf had never thought of smurfing a line between the villages to keep the two Smurfs apart from each other, I certainly would be the one to smurf up with the idea in his place."

"Would you mind if I help you smurf the line through the village, Brainy?" Smurfette asked. "After all, I do want to make sure that my two favorite Smurfs in the village don't get hurt."

"Why, sure, Smurfette, anything for you," Brainy said as he continued to paint the line.

Smurfette smiled wickedly for a moment, realizing that her plan is working. "Okay, now smurf a little to the right," she directed.

Brainy then turned to the right, and as he continued to paint the line, he painted it right over Lazy while he was sleeping on the ground, waking him up to see what was done to him.

"Now smurf it a little to the left," Smurfette directed.

Brainy then turned to the left, and this time he painted the line right over Grouchy's feet while paying no attention to where he was going. "I hate somebody smurfing a line over my feet," Grouchy said.

Then with Smurfette telling him where to turn, Brainy found himself hitting the door of a Smurf's house. He knocked to ask if he could be let in, and the Smurf answered only to find Brainy painting a line straight through his house until he went out through the window, separating the house into two halves.

Then Hefty and Handy found Brainy busy at work with painting the line. "Hey, what's the big idea smurfing a line through the whole village?" Hefty asked with great displeasure.

"Yeah, this idea is just plain ridiculous," Handy said in the same tone as Hefty.

"Papa Smurf said that this line must be smurfed so that you, Hefty, and your rowdy friends stay on one side of the line and you, Handy, and your unsmurfy pals stay on the other side of the line," Brainy said. "And I for one couldn't agree more with this idea, because if Papa Smurf haven't smurfed of it, then I certainly would have."

"Well, this is what I think about your idea, Brainy," Hefty said as he kicked Brainy over to Handy's side of the line.

"And this is what I think of it as well," Handy said as he kicked Brainy over to Hefty's side of the line.

"That's it, you two Smurfs," Brainy said as he straddled the line between the two Smurfs. "I'm going to smurf this matter to Papa Smurf, and then you'll be the ones who are sorry that you ever thought of..."

Brainy found the can of paint landing on top of his head, soaking him in black paint. "PAPA SMURF!" he cried out as he ran away. - Meanwhile, Gargamel was sitting by the window of his hovel, looking out into the forest with his cat Azrael sitting next to him.

"Just imagine the wonderful sounds of chaos going on in the village, Azrael," Gargamel said. "Those once-happy Smurfs must be tearing themselves apart with wanting to be the one whom Smurfette will marry. They will be so busy fighting among themselves that they won't notice me entering their village and scooping them up so that I can finally make the Philosopher's Stone a reality."

Gargamel laughed at that thought, as also did Azrael. - Back in the village, Smurfette saw Hefty and Handy staring at each other across the dividing line that separated them. She didn't say a word, just simply watched to see what will happen next.

"I dare you to smurf across this line if you have the smurfs for it, Handy Smurf," Hefty shouted.

"Oh yeah? Then I dare you to smurf across it, unless you're chicken, Hefty Smurf," Handy shouted back.

"Nobody calls Hefty Smurf a chicken, Handy," Tuffy shouted.

"Then he'd better put his smurf where his mouth is, laddie," Duncan shouted back.

"It's just as I thought...you will always smurf out as second-best in this village, Handy," Hefty said.

"And you will always smurf more muscles than you smurf brains, Hefty," Handy said.

And soon both Smurfs engaged themselves in a fistfight that also involved the other Smurfs that were standing nearby, except for Smurfette, who just continued to watch as more Smurfs got involved in the same fight over Hefty and Handy, not seeming to care who got hurt in the process.

Then Tapper stepped out and saw what was happening. "Fellow Smurfs, please! Let's not smurf among ourselves over something as silly as...," he began to say as he tried to separate his fellow Smurfs from each other, but he soon got pummeled and knocked out by the Smurfs that he was trying to separate.

Smurfette smiled as she continued to watch the chaos build before she nonchalantly walked off, saying to herself, "Smurfs will be Smurfs."

Then Papa Smurf came out of his laboratory with a test tube full of a potion he was making. "Smurfs, I think that I have found an antidote to cure Smurfette," he said proudly before he saw that there was a village-wide fight going on. "What's going on? Stop this fighting at once! Stop it, I say!" he shouted.

Then one of the Smurfs who was busy fighting knocked the test tube out of Papa Smurf's hand, shattering it on the ground and causing the antidote to spill all over.

"Oh no," Papa Smurf said as he looked at all the chaos going on. "My little Smurfs won't even listen to me anymore. I've got to smurf up with a solution to bring everybody to their senses."

Then Papa Smurf saw Tapper lying on the ground, looking like he had been a victim of the fighting. "Tapper!" he cried out as he pulled the village bartender to a safe place to examine him.

Tapper opened his eyes rather weakly and saw who it was. "Papa Smurf...must get...this fighting...to stop...or else...Gargamel...you must find...Gargamel...," he muttered before he collapsed into unconsciousness.

Papa Smurf realized what Tapper was trying to tell him. "Rest easy, my little Tapper, and I promise that I will restore order soon," he said to the unconscious Smurf before he headed out of the village.