Empath's Rib

One day, Tapper found Empath sitting at the counter of Tapper's Tavern, just staring at the daily crossword puzzle without filling it with any words. "Now that is something that I don't normally smurf in your copy of the newspaper, Empath," Tapper said. "By this time, you would have more than half of the puzzle already smurfed. Either you're smurfed for words or your mind isn't on the crossword puzzle."

"This smurf is trying to think of anything besides what this smurf had found out from Papa Smurf about something that was extracted from this smurf years ago," Empath said. "You know that this smurf had a broken rib, and Papa Smurf had to do some surgery to remove it or else this smurf wouldn't be able to live."

"I do remember that day, which is quite unusual for you to be under anyone's operating table for anything," Tapper said.

"The pain was so unbearable that this smurf couldn't concentrate on using this smurf's minds-eye to heal it or anything," Empath said. "Anyway, Papa Smurf never said what he had done with the rib that was extracted from this smurf, but from what this smurf read about the formula Papa Smurf used to change Smurfette into a real Smurf, it required the broken rib of a male Smurf."

"So you believe Papa Smurf had presmurfed the rib that was smurfed out to use in the formula that turned Smurfette into a real Smurf?" Tapper asked.

"Papa Smurf actually said he did when this smurf asked him about it," Empath said.

"That's very interesting to discover, Empath," Tapper said, rubbing his chin while thinking. "You know, there may be something about this rib that was extracted from you to make Smurfette that reminds me of something from the holy book."

"And what exactly is that, if you don't mind this smurf asking?" Empath asked.

"From the book of Genesis, when the Almighty had created the heavens and the earth, on the sixth day He created the first man," Tapper said. "He smurfed him charge over all of creation, and also smurfed him in charge of his garden in Eden, to dress it and to keep it. The Almighty smurfed the first man all the animals of the earth to him, and he named each one. Yet the Almighty saw that the man was alone, and among the animals there was not found one who was suitable enough to complete him as his helper. So the Almighty smurfed the man to sleep, and from him smurfed one of his ribs and smurfed it into the form of a woman, and when she was presented to the man, he called her Woman."

"You mean the story of Adam and Eve?" Empath asked.

"The very same story indeed, Empath," Tapper said. "It is for this reason that a man shall leave his father and mother and be smurfed to his wife, and they shall be as one flesh."

"Great Ancestors," Empath exclaimed when he realized something. "Are you suggesting that this smurf is attracted to Smurfette because...a portion of this smurf was used to make her into a real Smurf?"

"It's only a possibility, Empath, but it's one worth considering," Tapper said. "Without her ever knowing about it, and without you even being here, you have smurfed her from being a creation of Gargamel into being a real Smurf. She may have smurfing for the one Smurf whom the rib belongs to in order to be smurfed to him as one flesh."

Empath pondered on what his friend was saying. "You think Papa Smurf might have been trying to set up this smurf and Smurfette to be united together in that fashion through this rib that was extracted from this smurf?" he asked.

"I don't think Papa Smurf would smurf that on purpose, but I do think Someone greater than him may be responsible for it without Papa Smurf ever really knowing about it," Tapper answered.

"So this smurf and Smurfette possibly marrying may be a divine appointment from this Almighty of yours, which is what you're trying to say," Empath said.

"As I have smurfed before, it is one possibility, Empath," Tapper answered. "But if this is the work of the Almighty, he may be smurfing this thing for a purpose, and I would be wondering what that purpose might be."

"This feels rather unsettling, Tapper, that first this smurf is compared to the only begotten Son of the Almighty, and now this smurf is being compared to the first man that the Almighty has created," Empath said. "This smurf wonders if this smurf will ever get away from being compared to any of these great people from your holy book."

"I know how much you want to smurf the simple life of a Smurf, and I don't blame you for that, my friend," Tapper said. "But the Almighty calls ordinary people to smurf extraordinary things, and while smurfing the burden of greatness can be a heavy load to smurf, I believe that things will all smurf out for good in the end."

"So this smurf is just being selfish for wanting to have a normal life?" Empath asked.

"We're all selfish of wanting things for ourselves, which is part of our nature as living beings, Empath," Tapper said. "But only the Almighty can satisfy the things in your heart that the world itself cannot smurf."