I Dream Of Smurfette (story)/Part 3

"So the Smurfette dream was starting to be every male Smurf's dream from that point on, Papa Smurf?" Empath asked.

"I didn't think that I would smurf most of my days counseling my little Smurfs about what's simply an act of nature, Empath," Papa Smurf said, sounding a little uneasy. "It was how they were handling this new information about themselves that eventually consmurfed me."

"This smurf can imagine that such information about their own biology would make their interactions with Smurfette rather difficult to deal with," Empath said.

"That's one way of smurfing the facts, Empath," Papa Smurf said.

And as Papa Smurf continued to tell his story, Empath saw that most of his fellow Smurfs were talking among themselves in little groups about what they experienced and how they felt about Smurfette now that they had the Smurfette dream happen to them.

"Gosh, I didn't think I would have a dream that would make me smurf like that, Dimwitty," Clumsy said.

"Yeah, but I sure don't know why we're even smurfing them in the first place," Dimwitty said.

"Papa Smurf says it's because we're smurfing of age to someday become a Papa Smurf," Clumsy said. "But honestly, I don't know the first thing about being a Papa Smurf."

"Me neither, but boy oh smurf, it would certainly feel smurfy being one with Smurfette," Dimwitty said. "I mean, don't you even notice how she smurfs?"

"Uh, yeah, sure I do, Dimwitty," Clumsy said. "She's real pretty and all, but me wanting to smurf those things with Smurfette? I mean, how does a Smurf even smurf those things with her?"

"Maybe it just starts off with kissing her, Clumsy," Dimwitty said.

"You think all that kissing's going to lead me to...uh, smurfing those things with Smurfette?" Clumsy said, carefully speaking his words very low so others wouldn't hear.

"Well, why wouldn't you think it would?" Dimwitty said. "I felt like I was kissing Smurfette all over in my dream that my lips were turning blue...well, some other kind of blue...you know what I mean."

"It sure isn't my lips that I'm thinking about, Dimwitty," Clumsy said. "I'm afraid that if I smurf too close to Smurfette, what...uh, smurfed in my dream might happen."

"That Smurfette's going to kiss you all over?" Dimwitty said. "You'd be a lucky Smurf if she smurfed that to you."

"Uh, the...other thing that smurfed in my dream," Clumsy said.

"Oh, the...other thing," Dimwitty said. "I think you would have to marry Smurfette if you want to smurf the...other thing with her."

"Marry Smurfette for the...other thing?" Clumsy said. "I just want to kiss her, not smurf that...other thing with her. I sure wouldn't want to be married just to kiss her."

"I just think that's how it smurfs, that's all," Dimwitty said. "Besides, Smurfette herself might not be interested in that...other thing."

"Golly, I just sure hope that she isn't," Clumsy said. - Meanwhile, Duncan was holding a conversation with Tapper. "I'm really starting to notice how different every male Smurf is smelling now that each of us has smurfed this 'Smurfette dream' that Papa Smurf has been smurfing about, laddie," Duncan said.

"It's only fortunate that I'm not blessed with this ability to smell that type of scent upon any male Smurf, my good Duncan, but it does make me consmurfed nonetheless," Tapper said.

"Tell me, how can every Smurf in the village be smurfing the same kind of dream of Smurfette all at once?" Duncan asked. "Is this some sort of evil spell that's been smurfed upon us by Gargamel?"

"Nay, I don't think this is any kind of magic at work," Tapper said. "But all the same, the very thought of ever smurfing that to Smurfette does make me feel rather unclean."

"Don't tell me that you never think about what it would be like to be alone with Smurfette like that, Tapper," Duncan said. "She's such a fine lassie that I can't help thinking about that."

"My thoughts of Smurfette have always been pure, Duncan," Tapper said. "I do not wish to entertain myself with such thinking that would not be appropriate for either of us."

"Aye, it figures that would be your response, dear boy," Duncan said. "But I wonder how Smurfette would feel if she knew that every Smurf is starting to have those...feelings for her, that this may be something that none of us can fully control."

"I'm certain that Papa Smurf will let Smurfette know about this and help her deal with this before anything unsmurfy happens to her, Duncan," Tapper said. "For now, I will consider this a real test of faith and virtue for the male Smurfs, and I will pray for their spirits to be strengthened through trials and temptations, and I will pray for your spirit as well."

"Aye, I wouldn't think that I would need to smurf any kind of help from a higher power to keep myself from smurfing that to Smurfette," Duncan said. "But you smurf what you must, Tapper. This is one battle that I cannot fight with swords and staves."

"I also pray for Smurfette's purity, Duncan," Tapper said. "After all, as she is living with a hundred male Smurfs, she will be dealing with temptation, and I would wish for her to remain pure until her wedding day."

"You think Smurfette will ever actually marry any one of us, Tapper?" Duncan asked.

"Oh, how could I not think that she would marry, Duncan?" Tapper answered. "The blessed angels in heaven would be rejoicing at the very mention of husband and wife on the day that she does, and I would want to be there to smurf it for myself."

"Even if it isn't you that she marries, Tapper?" Duncan asked. "I would think that you would be a very sad Smurf on that day that she marries."

"I rest in the hands of the Almighty to let Him decide my fate, Duncan," Tapper said. "Whether that fate leads me to marrying Smurfette or not, my heart shall remain smurffast in the One that I put my trust in." - Meanwhile, Brainy was talking to Papa Smurf about the issue of the Smurfette dream.

"I don't understand how it's even possible for me to smurf that kind of a dream about Smurfette, Papa Smurf," Brainy said. "I mean, I do want to stimulate Smurfette in a highly intelligent and intellectual conversation, but I would never expect it to stimulate her in areas that I would expect myself to be stimulated in."

"As I told you and all my little Smurfs, Brainy, it's just something that smurfs naturally to Smurfs your age," Papa Smurf said. "It's nothing that any of you should be ashamed about."

"Papa Smurf, I am the kind of Smurf who believes in smurfing my life through the power of higher reasoning," Brainy said. "What this whole 'Smurfette dream' is about seems to be smurfing on base creature instincts that I don't want to smurf any part of."

"Those 'creature instincts' that we have are just simply a part of us that we must learn to control as creatures of higher reasoning, Brainy," Papa Smurf said. "That doesn't mean that we won't smurf prey to the temptation of smurfing things that we shouldn't be smurfing."

"Honestly, Papa Smurf, I would never smurf anything to Smurfette physically that would ever hurt her," Brainy said. "I believe it is something that she should know firsthand from me of all Smurfs."

"I know that you won't, Brainy," Papa Smurf said. "But sometimes the attraction can be so strong that it may cause us to smurf aside all restraint. That's why you must resolve it within yourself that no matter what matters, you will keep yourself in control of those desires until the day you are married to the one you love."

"Oh, certainly, Papa Smurf," Brainy said. "I happen to be a firm believer in a healthy and monogamous relationship between a Smurf and a Smurfette, that marriage is a sacred vow between a male and a female that must be honored, and that there must be mutual understanding between two who are in..."

"Hmmm, what's this laughter that I'm hearing from Jokey's house?" Papa Smurf asked, interrupting Brainy's thoughts as he saw a crowd gathered around Jokey.

"It must be Jokey exhibiting his usual sense of humor, if he isn't trying to smurf me with his ridiculous exploding presents," Brainy said.

Papa Smurf decided to listen in on what Jokey was telling his fellow Smurfs. "And you see, Greedy was smurfing me on how big he wanted to smurf his muffins, so I was telling him maybe you should smurf how big you want Smurfette's muffins to be," Jokey said.

Every Smurf in the crowd except for Brainy and Papa Smurf laughed at that comment.

"And there was also Biscotti smurfing me about this big long tube full of cream that he uses to smurf cream inside the morning muffins, and he was telling me the best method for smurfing the cream is to smurf the tube gently into the muffins, and I was asking if that's what you're planning to smurf with Smurfette one of these days when you smurf married to her," Jokey said.

Again every Smurf in the crowd laughed except for Brainy and Papa Smurf, the latter of whom cleared his throat loud enough to get every Smurf's attention.

"Hey, what's smurfing on, Papa Smurf?" Jokey asked. "Care to hear my latest smurf-up routine?"

"I don't think that your humor is very appropriate for this smurf-up routine that you're smurfing, Jokey," Papa Smurf said.

"I for one couldn't agree more on this, Papa Smurf," Brainy added.

"Oh, come on, Papa Smurf," Jokey said. "You know that every Smurf in this crowd must be having what they would want to do with Smurfette on their minds. I think you should just let them loosen up and smurf a laugh about it."

"I wouldn't if I were you want to have Smurfette hearing the kind of jokes that are smurfing from your mouth right now, Jokey," Papa Smurf said.

"Hey, we want to hear Jokey's jokes, Papa Smurf," one of the Smurfs in the crowd said.

"Yeah, don't be such a prude," another Smurf said.

And more complaints were raised from the other Smurfs until Papa Smurf had silenced them.

"Enough," Papa Smurf said. "I know that dealing with the fact that you are growing into mature adult Smurfs is not an easy thing to smurf, but that doesn't excuse the fact that using such unsmurfy humor to deal with these changes is not the way to smurf it. If you're going to make such unsmurfy jokes, I would rather you smurf them in private than smurf them in a way that everybody can hear you, including Smurfette. Is that understood?"

"Yes, Papa Smurf," all the Smurfs in the crowd said in unison.

Jokey watched in disgust as his crowd all left and went their own separate ways. "Well, that was just great, Papa Smurf," he complained. "You know that I'm not the kind of Smurf who would smurf such humor in front of Smurfette even if I wanted to."

"If you truly love Smurfette, Jokey, you wouldn't be smurfing such humor about her in the first place," Papa Smurf said.

"I do love Smurfette, Papa Smurf," Jokey said. "But you can't stop Smurfs from having such smurfy thoughts about her...unless you're just too old for that sort of thing."

"That's enough, Jokey," Papa Smurf said sternly. "What you think about Smurfette is your smurfness, but you are not going to smurf such humor in public as long as I am still the leader of this village. Is that understood?"

Jokey sighed. "Yes, Papa Smurf, I understand." He went inside his house and slammed the door behind him.

"Well, I for one can't understand why Smurfs like him would stoop to smurfing such vulgar humor in regards to dealing with these changes that we're smurfing through, Papa Smurf," Brainy said.

"Just because your body matures doesn't mean that your mind matures along with it, Brainy," Papa Smurf said. "Getting used to what your adult body now smurfs will take some time for you and your fellow Smurfs to properly adjust to, but all the same, you should still learn to treat female Smurfs you interact with with some respect. After all, we can't be certain if a female Smurf's desires are the same as ours."

"What is it that female Smurfs desire, Papa Smurf?" Brainy asked.

"That part has always been tricky for male Smurfs to figure out, Brainy," Papa Smurf said. "At the very least, all female Smurfs really expect from a male Smurf is to simply love them."

"That's what we're trying to do with Smurfette, right, Papa Smurf?" Brainy asked.

"Uh...yes, to the best of our own abilities as male Smurfs," Papa Smurf answered. - Meanwhile, Painter was busy in his studio when Poet paid him a visit. "I was just thinking about this poem that I have written about Smurfette, which suddenly smurfed to me after I had this 'Smurfette dream' that everybody's been smurfing about, and..." Poet stopped when he saw a whole lot of paintings of Smurfette that were done by Painter. "My smurf, how did you manage to smurf all those paintings of Smurfette?"

"Je n'ai aucune idée, mon frere," Painter said. "Ever since I had the 'Smurfette dream', I have just been inspired to smurf all these masteurpiesas all at once. I couldn't even smurf my paintbrush down after completing one picture."

"Wow, I never would have thought that you smurf all these pictures just from your dreams like that," Poet said. "And what's more, you've been smurfing her in all kinds of poses, even some that I would want to smurf her in myself."

"With all these pictures, I don't know if I'm truly being an artist or just smurfing in pornographia, Poet," Painter said.

"I don't even know what pornographia is, but I'd be very careful smurfing these pictures to any Smurf if I were you, Painter," Poet said. "Anyway, I've been smurfing on this poem ever since I had the 'Smurfette dream', and I smurfonally can't believe that this is even me smurfing all this."

"You do not sound very comfortable with the idea of sharing this poem with anybody, Poet, and yet you come to me with it," Painter said.

"I just don't know who else to share this with, Painter, without sounding very unsmurfy," Poet said. "It's called 'I Dream Of Smurfette'." He cleared his throat as he decided to recite a portion of his work.

I dream of the Smurfette, the angel in blue How I long in my dream to smurf my love to you To feel the soft touch of your warm smurfy skin To be smurfed as two hearts that beat from within How you smurf the part of me in the way that you dance The grace of your smurfs that leaves me entranced To fill you inside with my own heart's desire How my love for you burns like an unsmurfable fire You're an ocean of fantasy in which I would dive deep To smurf you in my arms when we're both fast asleep And when we awake, how I'd kiss you some more To smurf you like luscious fruits I would adore

"Oh, please, don't smurf me any more of your poem," Painter said. "It's only making me feel more attracted to Smurfette."

"That's just the problem, Painter," Poem said. "It seems that I just can't smurf my mind off Smurfette and the things that I smurf myself doing to her in those dreams that are making me smurf those things in writing."

"Nor can I with my paintings," Painter said. "It makes me regret the day that I ever decided to smurf up a paintbrush."

"I'm sure we'll find other things in our lives besides Smurfette to smurf our works from," Poet said. "I mean, who else besides us is going to express ourselves artistically about Smurfette in this manner?"

Suddenly the two Smurfs could hear an accordion playing from a house in another part of the village. "Sacre bleu, it's that Amore Smurf," Painter said.

"Yeah, but what is that music he's even performing?" Poet asked, sounding curious.

"I don't want to know, but I'm feeling compelled to find out," Painter said as he joined his brother in leaving the studio to see where the music was coming from. Sure enough, they found Amore leaving his house playing the accordion and singing very loudly, as if he was high on something.

Harmony had just joined Poet and Painter. "What is that racket smurfing on out here?" he asked.

"It's M'sieu Amore with his accordion," Painter said.

"Yeah, and he seems so happy singing about Smurfette," Poet said.

"Oh, I knew that he would be the first to smurf a song about Smurfette after he had that 'Smurfette dream' like everybody else," Harmony said, sounding a bit jealous.

"Well, at least his music is much better listening to than yours, Harmony," Poet said.

"Okay, that does it," Harmony said, sounding like he was getting mad. "I'm going to compose a truly heartsmurfing symphony that will sweep Smurfette off her feet, and we'll see whose music she likes to listen to better."

"Bon voyage, M'sieu Harmony," Painter said as he watched Harmony head off in another direction.

Meanwhile, a crowd was gathering around Amore as he continued to play his music, not seeming to be bothered by the fact that he was drawing a crowd. In fact, he didn't seem to be paying any attention to anything that was around him.

"How long is this thing going to continue?" one of the Smurfs asked.

"Who knows? How long are we even going to have this 'Smurfette dream'?" another Smurf said.

"I don't think I can stand the idea that all of us are going to keep smurfing the 'Smurfette dream', Painter," Poet said.

"Mais qu'allons-nous faire?" Painter asked.

"Don't ask me," Poet said. "Only Papa Smurf knows more about this 'Smurfette dream'. The only thing I want is for our lives to resmurf to normal."

"I'm not sure if that will ever happen as long as Smurfette is part of our village, and we keep smurfing these dreams, mon frere," Painter said.