Talk:Empath The Wartmonger/Part 6/@comment-4165715-20140616232435

Great story, but you tend to say "Polaris" or "Polaris Psyche" more than enough times, which could be replaced with pronouns. It's hard to read something like, "Polaris arrived and Papa Smurf cried, "Polaris!" while both Hefty and Duncan cheered for Polaris, enjoying how Polaris Psyche was able to overtake the unsmurfed Empath." That sentence was purely an example - it just felt like I was reading in that fashion.